All or Nothing

Something that I’ll never claim I have is willpower.  Especially when it comes to food…junk food in particular!

Bag of chips?   I’ll eat the whole thing.  Remember the Lays chips “Betcha can’t eat just one” campaign?  That’s me.  One is not real.

Case of pop?   I won’t stop until most of it is gone.

M&Ms?   Don’t stand a chance.  My boyfriend still likes to remind me of the time I ate his whole bag of them when we first started hanging out.  Apparently he was slightly upset about it, but luckily still decided to keep me around!

Me and M&Ms…true love!

As I’ve said before, I work in health and fitness.  And this type of behaviour doesn’t exactly fit with living a healthy lifestyle.  So I had to adapt.  I stopped buying any type of junk food and rarely brought it into my house.  If it’s not there, I can’t eat it!  For me, that worked really well.  If there’s no temptation, there’s nothing to give in to.  So no junk, no worries, and a healthy happy me.

And then I got diabetes.

Now, I need to keep sources of sugar around the house in the event of a low blood sugar episode.  For me, this is a recipe for disaster.  Just knowing it’s there makes me want to eat it.  All of it.  The treatment procedure for a low is to consume 15g of carbohydrate, wait about 15 minutes and test again.  Repeat if needed.  15g isn’t a lot of carb.  That’s only about 6 Lifesavers.  WHO ONLY EATS 6 LIFESAVERS?????  Obviously not me.  I want them all.  Leave no man behind!

To treat lows, I generally use glucose tabs.  There’s a reason for this.  In the beginning, I was using Rockets, and idea I picked up from another blogger.  That turned out to be a huge mistake.  I brought them home and stashed them away, but had to treat a low later that night.  I ate the whole bag.  THE WHOLE BAG.  And I wasn’t even that low, maybe at 3.4 so there was no reason to eat that many.  So I then had to follow that up with a correction a little while later.  Fun.

I’d like to say it was an isolated incident, but it happened to me three other times before I finally learned my lesson.  I never said I was a fast learner!  So I keep glucose tabs now.  And even those aren’t safe.  I’ve had my boyfriend take them away from me at times because I can’t stop snacking on them.  No lie. So what’s a girl with no willpower to do when surrounded by temptation? According to Oscar Wilde,

The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it.

But what if that’s not an option?  I can’t give in or I’d have nothing to treat lows with, and I’d have perpetually high blood sugars.  Not winning.  I’m trying other options (juice boxes being one of them), and trying to work on my willpower.  Eat what I need, and put it back.  Way easier said than done.  Especially when your brain wants ALL THE SWEETS!!!!  Shush sugar demon, you can’t have me!

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One thought on “All or Nothing

  1. I was diabetic when I was pregnant with both the boys and I was so scared of low sugars. If my sugars got below 2 I would pass out and home alone with small children that is not an option. So I had white chocolate pieces in baggies that sometimes Gord would have to hide around the house or even outside. I always knew where there was one just in case and if heaven forbid I needed another one for a low I would have to call him and ask for the location of another one. He could always tell if it was a serious low sugar alert or if I was just desperately “jonseing” for some sweets!

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